Thanks for your message. I have faith that Thomas is in Heaven and is blissfully happy there. When he passed away I know he went home to Jesus. The peace that fell on us when he left was huge, it was like a happy departing, like it was the right thing. I know that Thomas is in a place where he isn't held back by his body anymore. I know that he has angels caring for him in a place where there is no pain, suffering, grief, anger, fear, disappointment, despair, disease, death, sickness, sadness, confusion, rejection or anxiety. That gives me joy.
Even though I am very sad, it is only a sadness for me and Dean and my family. I am sad that my beautiful Thomas' life never got the right start but it is me and mine that have missed out on having him with us during our lives. He is in the eternal place and I will see him there.
There is a poem that I found on the Internet called "Welcome to Holland" it describes how I felt about becoming a parent to a child with Down syndrome. Now that he has died, I feel like I have been sent back to Australia, but what I would dearly love to do, is get back to Holland.
Here it is.